Компьютерщики: Голый календарь

Have you nearly finished, Roy?

hæv ju ˈnɪrli ˈfɪnɪʃt, rɔɪ?

Yeah.

jæ.

You are taking a very long time.

ju ər ˈteɪkɪŋ ə ˈvɛri lɔŋ taɪm.

It is a very complicated problem. You have a lot of chabaranks in your hard drive. I'll get them out eventually. Frustrating! Come on! Work! Work!

ɪt ɪz ə ˈvɛri ˈkɑmpləˌkeɪtəd ˈprɑbləm. ju hæv ə lɔt əv chabaranks ɪn jʊr hɑrd draɪv. aɪl gɪt ðɛm aʊt ɪˈvɛnʧəwəli. ˈfrəˌstreɪtɪŋ! kəm ɔn! wərk! wərk!

Nadine, do you know anything about digital cameras?

nəˈdin, du ju noʊ ˈɛniˌθɪŋ əˈbaʊt ˈdɪʤɪtəl ˈkæmərəz?

Roy might.

rɔɪ maɪt.

I do, as it happens. I'm an amateur photographer, actually.

aɪ du, ɛz ɪt ˈhæpənz. əm ən ˈæməˌʧər fəˈtɑgrəfər, ˈæˌkʧuəli.

I've just got this new one, but it's really complicated.

aɪv ʤɪst gɑt ðɪs nu wən, bət ɪts ˈrɪli ˈkɑmpləˌkeɪtəd.

Oh. That's fixed.

oʊ. ðæts fɪkst.

What was wrong with it?

wət wɑz rɔŋ wɪθ ɪt?

It wasn't turned on.

ɪt ˈwəzənt tərnd ɔn.

Oh I don't even know why I got rid of my old one. It was working perfectly fine.

oʊ aɪ doʊnt ˈivɪn noʊ waɪ aɪ gɑt rɪd əv maɪ oʊld wən. ɪt wɑz ˈwərkɪŋ ˈpərfəktli faɪn.

Yeah, well, these all look good. What's going on with this fella? Look at him! He's pulling a mad face, he looks completely mental!

jæ, wɛl, ðiz ɔl lʊk gʊd. wəts goʊɪŋ ɔn wɪθ ðɪs ˈfɛlə? lʊk æt ɪm! hiz ˈpʊlɪŋ ə mæd feɪs, hi lʊks kəmˈplitli ˈmɛntəl!

That's Dave, my brother. He's got a very serious condition.

ðæts deɪv, maɪ ˈbrəðər. hiz gɑt ə ˈvɛri ˈsɪriəs kənˈdɪʃən.

When I said mental there, I meant mental in the sense of intelligent. You know, like he's a big reader.

wɪn aɪ sɛd ˈmɛntəl ðɛr, aɪ mɛnt ˈmɛntəl ɪn ðə sɛns əv ˌɪnˈtɛləʤənt. ju noʊ, laɪk hiz ə bɪg ˈridər.

He has boss-eyedness.

hi həz boss-eyedness.

Boss-eyedness?

boss-eyedness?

He's permanently boss-eyed.

hiz ˈpərmɑˌnɛnˌtli boss-eyed.

That must be a big pain in the arse.

ðət məst bi ə bɪg peɪn ɪn ðə ɑrs.

It is, and the terrible thing is people think there's actually something funny about this.

ɪt ɪz, ənd ðə ˈtɛrəbəl θɪŋ ɪz ˈpipəl θɪŋk ðɛrz ˈæˌkʧuəli ˈsəmθɪŋ ˈfəni əˈbaʊt ðɪs.

No! Who could think there's something funny about this?

noʊ! hu kʊd θɪŋk ðɛrz ˈsəmθɪŋ ˈfəni əˈbaʊt ðɪs?

It's a proper condition, and he really suffers. He really...

ɪts ə ˈprɑpər kənˈdɪʃən, ənd hi ˈrɪli ˈsəfərz. hi ˈrɪli...

Oh, hey.

oʊ, heɪ.

I'd just give anything if Dave could have a normal life.

aɪd ʤɪst gɪv ˈɛniˌθɪŋ ɪf deɪv kʊd hæv ə ˈnɔrməl laɪf.

Oh, hey, now.

oʊ, heɪ, naʊ.

Kimberly, are you OK?

ˈkɪmbərli, ər ju ˈoʊˈkeɪ?

It's just Dave.

ɪts ʤɪst deɪv.

Oh, poor Dave. Hey, I've got a great idea. Why don't we all try and do something to raise money for people like Dave? Yeah, we must be able to think of something, like a fun run!

oʊ, pur deɪv. heɪ, aɪv gɑt ə greɪt aɪˈdiə. waɪ doʊnt wi ɔl traɪ ənd du ˈsəmθɪŋ tɪ reɪz ˈməni fər ˈpipəl laɪk deɪv? jæ, wi məst bi ˈeɪbəl tɪ θɪŋk əv ˈsəmθɪŋ, laɪk ə fən rən!

That's a good idea.

ðæts ə gʊd aɪˈdiə.

Or a nude calendar.

ər ə nud ˈkæləndər.

That's maybe even a better idea than the fun run idea!

ðæts ˈmeɪbi ˈivɪn ə ˈbɛtər aɪˈdiə ðən ðə fən rən aɪˈdiə!

We could call it The Girls of the Seventh Floor.

wi kʊd kɔl ɪt ðə gərlz əv ðə ˈsɛvənθ flɔr.

Yes! Yes! It's a very strong theme!

jɛs! jɛs! ɪts ə ˈvɛri strɔŋ θim!

Roy could be the photographer.

rɔɪ kʊd bi ðə fəˈtɑgrəfər.

I could do the photographs because I said I was an amateur photographer!

aɪ kʊd du ðə ˈfoʊtəˌgræfs bɪˈkəz aɪ sɛd aɪ wɑz ən ˈæməˌʧər fəˈtɑgrəfər!

Come on, let's do a brainstorm. I'd like to be November if that's OK.

kəm ɔn, lɛts du ə ˈbreɪnˌstɔrm. aɪd laɪk tɪ bi noʊˈvɛmbər ɪf ðæts ˈoʊˈkeɪ.

Can I be April?

kən aɪ bi ˈeɪprəl?

Yes!

jɛs!

And on October, we've got to have a Halloween theme

ənd ɔn ɑkˈtoʊbər, wiv gɑt tɪ hæv ə ˌhæləˈwin θim