Бойфренд из будущего: Последний день дома

I invited my foolish friend Jay around for tennis because I thought he'd make me look good. I was wrong!

aɪ ˌɪnˈvaɪtɪd maɪ ˈfulɪʃ frɛnd ʤeɪ əraʊnd fər ˈtɛnɪs bɪˈkəz aɪ θɔt hid meɪk mi lʊk gʊd. aɪ wɑz rɔŋ!

What are you doing?

wət ər ju duɪŋ?

Charlotte just made both of us look like idiots. How the hell are you meant to concentrate on your game? How are you meant to live your life with this sort of

ˈʃɑrlət ʤɪst meɪd boʊθ əv ˈjuˈɛs lʊk laɪk ˈɪˌdiəts. haʊ ðə hɛl ər ju mɛnt tɪ ˈkɑnsənˌtreɪt ɔn jʊr geɪm? haʊ ər ju mɛnt tɪ lɪv jʊr laɪf wɪθ ðɪs sɔrt əv

shit going down? It never got better until suddenly it was almost too late.

ʃɪt goʊɪŋ daʊn? ɪt ˈnɛvər gɑt ˈbɛtər ənˈtɪl ˈsədənli ɪt wɑz ˈɔlˌmoʊst tu leɪt.

Well, Charlotte, our final lunch.

wɛl, ˈʃɑrlət, ɑr ˈfaɪnəl lənʧ.

No!

noʊ!

And it's been really, really lovely having you all summer.

ənd ɪts bɪn ˈrɪli, ˈrɪli ˈləvli ˈhævɪŋ ju ɔl ˈsəmər.

Thank you. Thank you.

θæŋk ju. θæŋk ju.

It has. It really has.

ɪt həz. ɪt ˈrɪli həz.

Hasn't it, Desmond?

ˈhæzənt ɪt, ˈdɛzmənd?

Beg your pardon?

bɛg jʊr ˈpɑrdən?

Lovely having Charlotte here all summer.

ˈləvli ˈhævɪŋ ˈʃɑrlət hir ɔl ˈsəmər.

Have you enjoyed having Charlotte here all summer, Tim?

hæv ju ˌɛnˈʤɔɪd ˈhævɪŋ ˈʃɑrlət hir ɔl ˈsəmər, tɪm?

Yeah.

jæ.

There goes August.

ðɛr goʊz ˈɔgəst.

Come in.

kəm ɪn.

Charlotte.

ˈʃɑrlət.

Yeah!

jæ!

As it's your last night, can I ask you a question?

ɛz ɪts jʊr læst naɪt, kən aɪ æsk ju ə kˈwɛʃən?

Oh. Yeah. Ask away. On no, wait. It's not going to be about love, is it?

oʊ. jæ. æsk əˈweɪ. ɔn noʊ, weɪt. ɪts nɑt goʊɪŋ tɪ bi əˈbaʊt ləv, ɪz ɪt?

Love? What?

ləv? wət?

Well, it's just that Kit Kat warned me that if you were to ever mention it, I should be very firm with you and tell you you must treat me like your sister. And not

wɛl, ɪts ʤɪst ðət kɪt kæt wɔrnd mi ðət ɪf ju wər tɪ ˈɛvər ˈmɛnʃən ɪt, aɪ ʃʊd bi ˈvɛri fərm wɪθ ju ənd tɛl ju ju məst trit mi laɪk jʊr ˈsɪstər. ənd nɑt

be stupid. Or have I just made a total fool of myself, and you were actually going to ask me for late night last minute tennis tips?

bi ˈstupɪd. ər hæv aɪ ʤɪst meɪd ə ˈtoʊtəl ful əv ˌmaɪˈsɛlf, ənd ju wər ˈæˌkʧuəli goʊɪŋ tɪ æsk mi fər leɪt naɪt læst ˈmɪnət ˈtɛnɪs tɪps?

No, it was the love thing.

noʊ, ɪt wɑz ðə ləv θɪŋ.

Well. That's very sweet of you. It's just a shame you left it till the last night. You should have tried creeping along the corridor while we still had time.

wɛl. ðæts ˈvɛri swit əv ju. ɪts ʤɪst ə ʃeɪm ju lɛft ɪt tɪl ðə læst naɪt. ju ʃʊd hæv traɪd ˈkripɪŋ əˈlɔŋ ðə ˈkɔrɪdər waɪl wi stɪl hæd taɪm.

Okay, the last night was a bad idea?

ˌoʊˈkeɪ, ðə læst naɪt wɑz ə bæd aɪˈdiə?

Very bad idea. It feels like an ever so slightly insulting afterthought. Last night was never going to work.

ˈvɛri bæd aɪˈdiə. ɪt filz laɪk ən ˈɛvər soʊ sˈlaɪtli ˌɪnˈsəltɪŋ ˈæftərˌθɔt. læst naɪt wɑz ˈnɛvər goʊɪŋ tɪ wərk.

All right. Good. I've got it.

ɔl raɪt. gʊd. aɪv gɑt ɪt.

Come in. Tim.

kəm ɪn. tɪm.

Charlotte.

ˈʃɑrlət.

Hi.

haɪ.

Hi. I know you've probably suspected this, but over the last month I've fallen completely in love with you. Now obviously this was going happen because you're a

haɪ. aɪ noʊ juv ˈprɑbəˌbli səˈspɛktɪd ðɪs, bət ˈoʊvər ðə læst mənθ aɪv ˈfɑlən kəmˈplitli ɪn ləv wɪθ ju. naʊ ˈɑbviəsli ðɪs wɑz goʊɪŋ ˈhæpən bɪˈkəz jʊr ə

goddess with that face and that hair, but even if you didn't have a nice face, and even if you had absolutely no hair because of some bizarre medical reason, I'd

ˈgɑdəs wɪθ ðət feɪs ənd ðət hɛr, bət ˈivɪn ɪf ju ˈdɪdənt hæv ə nis feɪs, ənd ˈivɪn ɪf ju hæd ˌæbsəˈlutli noʊ hɛr bɪˈkəz əv səm bɪˈzɑr ˈmɛdɪkəl ˈrizən, aɪd

still adore you, and I... I just wondered whether, by any chance, you might share my feelings.

stɪl əˈdɔr ju, ənd aɪ... aɪ ʤɪst ˈwəndərd ˈwɛðər, baɪ ˈɛni ʧæns, ju maɪt ʃɛr maɪ ˈfilɪŋz.

Wow. I tell you what. Why don't we see how the summer goes, and then you ask me again on my last night?

waʊ. aɪ tɛl ju wət. waɪ doʊnt wi si haʊ ðə ˈsəmər goʊz, ənd ðɛn ju æsk mi əˈgɛn ɔn maɪ læst naɪt?

Your last night?

jʊr læst naɪt?

Yes. Try me on the last night. See what happens then, shall we? It's exciting.

jɛs. traɪ mi ɔn ðə læst naɪt. si wət ˈhæpənz ðɛn, ʃæl wi? ɪts ɪkˈsaɪtɪŋ.

Right. No, it's a perfect plan. That's absolutely perfect. Last night.

raɪt. noʊ, ɪts ə ˈpərˌfɪkt plæn. ðæts ˌæbsəˈlutli ˈpərˌfɪkt. læst naɪt.

Last night.

læst naɪt.

Thanks very much.

θæŋks ˈvɛri məʧ.

Night-night, Timmy.

night-night, ˈtɪmi.

Big lesson number one, all the time travel in the world can't make someone love you.

bɪg ˈlɛsən ˈnəmbər wən, ɔl ðə taɪm ˈtrævəl ɪn ðə wərld kænt meɪk ˈsəmˌwən ləv ju.

Bye!

baɪ!

So the love of my life just drove away. And the very next day, it was my turn to leave.

soʊ ðə ləv əv maɪ laɪf ʤɪst droʊv əˈweɪ. ənd ðə ˈvɛri nɛkst deɪ, ɪt wɑz maɪ tərn tɪ liv.