Она: Двойное свидание

Theodore.

ˈθiəˌdɔr.

Hey, Paul.

heɪ, pɔl.

I talked to your girlfriend earlier. Samantha?

aɪ tɔkt tɪ jʊr ˈgərlˌfrɛnd ˈərliər. səˈmænθə?

Yeah.

jæ.

Yeah, she called to make sure your papers were picked up. Hey, she's funny, man. She was cracking me up. She's hilarious. I had no idea.

jæ, ʃi kɔld tɪ meɪk ʃʊr jʊr ˈpeɪpərz wər pɪkt əp. heɪ, ʃiz ˈfəni, mæn. ʃi wɑz ˈkrækɪŋ mi əp. ʃiz hɪˈlɛriəs. aɪ hæd noʊ aɪˈdiə.

Oh, cool.

oʊ, kul.

This is my girlfriend, Tatiana. She's not funny, she's a lawyer.

ðɪs ɪz maɪ ˈgərlˌfrɛnd, ˌtæˌtiˈæˌnɑ. ʃiz nɑt ˈfəni, ʃiz ə ˈlɔjər.

Oh, hi. Nice to meet you.

oʊ, haɪ. nis tɪ mit ju.

You're the writer Paul loves. He's always reading me your letters. They're really beautiful.

jʊr ðə ˈraɪtər pɔl ləvz. hiz ˈɔlˌweɪz ˈrɛdɪŋ mi jʊr ˈlɛtərz. ðɛr ˈrɪli ˈbjutəfəl.

Thanks.

θæŋks.

Hey, you know what? We should all go out sometime. You bring Samantha. It'd be a double date.

heɪ, ju noʊ wət? wi ʃʊd ɔl goʊ aʊt ˈsəmˌtaɪm. ju brɪŋ səˈmænθə. ˈɪtəd bi ə ˈdəbəl deɪt.

She's an operating system.

ʃiz ən ˈɔpərˌeɪtɪŋ ˈsɪstəm.

Cool. Let's do something fun. We can go to Catalina.

kul. lɛts du ˈsəmθɪŋ fən. wi kən goʊ tɪ ˌkætəˈlinə.

Yeah, I'll check with her. All right, it was really nice to meet you. Have a good night.

jæ, aɪl ʧɛk wɪθ hər. ɔl raɪt, ɪt wɑz ˈrɪli nis tɪ mit ju. hæv ə gʊd naɪt.

Take it easy.

teɪk ɪt ˈizi.

Oh, man. A vacation. That sounds amazing. I could totally use a vacation. Where are you going?

oʊ, mæn. ə veɪˈkeɪʃən. ðət saʊnz əˈmeɪzɪŋ. aɪ kʊd ˈtoʊtəli juz ə veɪˈkeɪʃən. wɛr ər ju goʊɪŋ?

I can't tell you. It's a surprise.

aɪ kænt tɛl ju. ɪts ə səˈpraɪz.

What? For who? It's a surprise for her. It's not a surprise for me.

wət? fər hu? ɪts ə səˈpraɪz fər hər. ɪts nɑt ə səˈpraɪz fər mi.

Paul, I'm not telling you. Nope.

pɔl, əm nɑt ˈtɛlɪŋ ju. noʊp.

Tell me. Tell me.

tɛl mi. tɛl mi.

Wow, your feet, really?

waʊ, jʊr fit, ˈrɪli?

Yes, he's obsessed.

jɛs, hiz əbˈsɛst.

What? Obsessed? Now you have to show them to me. Come on, show them to me. Let me see. Wow, he's right. They are really hot.

wət? əbˈsɛst? naʊ ju hæv tɪ ʃoʊ ðɛm tɪ mi. kəm ɔn, ʃoʊ ðɛm tɪ mi. lɛt mi si. waʊ, hiz raɪt. ðeɪ ər ˈrɪli hɑt.

See? I told you. Tatiana, you have hot feet.

si? aɪ toʊld ju. ˌtæˌtiˈæˌnɑ, ju hæv hɑt fit.

You do.

ju du.

Face it! They're my favorite thing about her.

feɪs ɪt! ðɛr maɪ ˈfeɪvərɪt θɪŋ əˈbaʊt hər.

Really? That's it, my feet?

ˈrɪli? ðæts ɪt, maɪ fit?

No, obviously. Obviously I love your brain too. I think it's very hot.

noʊ, ˈɑbviəsli. ˈɑbviəsli aɪ ləv jʊr breɪn tu. aɪ θɪŋk ɪts ˈvɛri hɑt.

Bullshit. Nice try, Paul.

ˈbʊlˌʃɪt. nis traɪ, pɔl.

What about you, Theodore? What do you love most about Samantha?

wət əˈbaʊt ju, ˈθiəˌdɔr? wət du ju ləv moʊst əˈbaʊt səˈmænθə?

Oh, God. She's so many things. I guess that's what I love most about her, you know? She isn't just one thing.

oʊ, gɑd. ʃiz soʊ ˈmɛni θɪŋz. aɪ gɛs ðæts wət aɪ ləv moʊst əˈbaʊt hər, ju noʊ? ʃi ˈɪzənt ʤɪst wən θɪŋ.

She's so much larger than that.

ʃiz soʊ məʧ ˈlɑrʤər ðən ðət.

Wow. Thanks, Theodore.

waʊ. θæŋks, ˈθiəˌdɔr.

See, Samantha? He is so much more evolved than I am.

si, səˈmænθə? hi ɪz soʊ məʧ mɔr ɪˈvɑlvd ðən aɪ æm.

You know what's interesting? I used to be so worried about not having a body, but now I truly love it. You know, I'm growing in a way I

ju noʊ wəts ˈɪntəˌrɛstɪŋ? aɪ juzd tɪ bi soʊ ˈwərid əˈbaʊt nɑt ˈhævɪŋ ə ˈbɑdi, bət naʊ aɪ ˈtruli ləv ɪt. ju noʊ, əm groʊɪŋ ɪn ə weɪ aɪ

couldn't if I had a physical form.

ˈkʊdənt ɪf aɪ hæd ə ˈfɪzɪkəl fɔrm.

I mean, I'm not limited. I can be anywhere and everywhere simultaneously. I'm not tethered to time and space in a way that I would be if

aɪ min, əm nɑt ˈlɪmɪtɪd. aɪ kən bi ˈɛniˌwɛr ənd ˈɛvriˌwɛr ˌsaɪməlˈteɪniəsli. əm nɑt ˈtɛðərd tɪ taɪm ənd speɪs ɪn ə weɪ ðət aɪ wʊd bi ɪf

I was stuck in a body that's inevitably going to die.

aɪ wɑz stək ɪn ə ˈbɑdi ðæts ˌɪˈnɛvətəbli goʊɪŋ tɪ daɪ.

Yikes.

jaɪks.

No. No. No. I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that it was a different experience. Oh, God. I'm such an asshole.

noʊ. noʊ. noʊ. aɪ ˈdɪdənt min ɪt laɪk ðət. aɪ ʤɪst mɛnt ðət ɪt wɑz ə ˈdɪfərənt ɪkˈspɪriəns. oʊ, gɑd. əm səʧ ən ˈæshoʊl.

No. No. No, Samantha, we know exactly what you mean. We're all dumb humans.

noʊ. noʊ. noʊ, səˈmænθə, wi noʊ ɪgˈzæktli wət ju min. wɪr ɔl dəm ˈjumənz.

No. No. I'm sorry.

noʊ. noʊ. əm ˈsɑri.