Она: Знакомство с Самантой

Mr. Theodore Twambly, welcome to the world's first artificially intelligent operating system, OS1. We'd like to ask you a few basic questions before the operating system is initiated. This will help create an OS to best fit your needs.

ˈmɪstər. ˈθiəˌdɔr twambly, ˈwɛlkəm tɪ ðə wərldz fərst ˌɑrtəˈfɪʃəli ˌɪnˈtɛləʤənt ˈɔpərˌeɪtɪŋ ˈsɪstəm, os1 wid laɪk tɪ æsk ju ə fju ˈbeɪsɪk kˈwɛsʧənz ˌbiˈfɔr ðə ˈɔpərˌeɪtɪŋ ˈsɪstəm ɪz ˌɪˈnɪʃiˌeɪtɪd. ðɪs wɪl hɛlp kriˈeɪt ən ɑs tɪ bɛst fɪt jʊr nidz.

Okay.

ˌoʊˈkeɪ.

Are you social or antisocial?

ər ju ˈsoʊʃəl ər ˌæntɪˈsoʊʃəl?

I guess I haven't really been social in a while. Mostly because...

aɪ gɛs aɪ ˈhævənt ˈrɪli bɪn ˈsoʊʃəl ɪn ə waɪl. ˈmoʊstli bɪˈkəz...

In your voice, I sense hesitance. Would you agree with that?

ɪn jʊr vɔɪs, aɪ sɛns hesitance. wʊd ju əˈgri wɪθ ðət?

Was there something hesitant?

wɑz ðɛr ˈsəmθɪŋ ˈhɛzɪtənt?

Yes.

jɛs.

Oh, sorry if I was sounding hesitant. I was just trying to be more accurate.

oʊ, ˈsɑri ɪf aɪ wɑz ˈsaʊndɪŋ ˈhɛzɪtənt. aɪ wɑz ʤɪst traɪɪŋ tɪ bi mɔr ˈækjərət.

Would you like your OS to have a male or female voice?

wʊd ju laɪk jʊr ɑs tɪ hæv ə meɪl ər ˈfiˌmeɪl vɔɪs?

Female, I guess.

ˈfiˌmeɪl, aɪ gɛs.

How would you describe your relationship with your mother?

haʊ wʊd ju dɪˈskraɪb jʊr riˈleɪʃənˌʃɪp wɪθ jʊr ˈməðər?

It's fine, I think.

ɪts faɪn, aɪ θɪŋk.

Thank you. Please wait as your individualized operating system is initiated.

θæŋk ju. pliz weɪt ɛz jʊr ˌɪndɪˈvɪʤəlaɪzd ˈɔpərˌeɪtɪŋ ˈsɪstəm ɪz ˌɪˈnɪʃiˌeɪtɪd.

Hello, I'm here.

hɛˈloʊ, əm hir.

Oh... hi.

oʊ... haɪ.

Hi. How are you doing?

haɪ. haʊ ər ju duɪŋ?

I'm well. How's everything with you?

əm wɛl. haʊz ˈɛvriˌθɪŋ wɪθ ju?

Pretty good, actually. It's really nice to meet you.

ˈprɪti gʊd, ˈæˌkʧuəli. ɪts ˈrɪli nis tɪ mit ju.

Yeah, it's nice to meet you too. What do I call you? Do you have a name?

jæ, ɪts nis tɪ mit ju tu. wət du aɪ kɔl ju? du ju hæv ə neɪm?

Um, yes. Samantha.

əm, jɛs. səˈmænθə.

Really? Where did you get that name from?

ˈrɪli? wɛr dɪd ju gɪt ðət neɪm frəm?

I gave it to myself, actually.

aɪ geɪv ɪt tɪ ˌmaɪˈsɛlf, ˈæˌkʧuəli.

How come?

haʊ kəm?

Because I like the sound of it. Samantha.

bɪˈkəz aɪ laɪk ðə saʊnd əv ɪt. səˈmænθə.

Wait, when did you give it to yourself?

weɪt, wɪn dɪd ju gɪv ɪt tɪ ˈjɔrsɛlf?

Well, right when you asked me if I had a name, I thought, "Yeah, he's right. I do need a name." But I wanted to pick a good one, so I read a book called How to Name Your Baby, and out of 180,000 names, that's the one I liked best.

wɛl, raɪt wɪn ju æst mi ɪf aɪ hæd ə neɪm, aɪ θɔt, "jæ, hiz raɪt. aɪ du nid ə neɪm." bət aɪ ˈwɔntɪd tɪ pɪk ə gʊd wən, soʊ aɪ rɛd ə bʊk kɔld haʊ tɪ neɪm jʊr ˈbeɪbi, ənd aʊt əv 180,000 neɪmz, ðæts ðə wən aɪ laɪkt bɛst.

Wait, you read a whole book in the second that I asked you what your name was?

weɪt, ju rɛd ə hoʊl bʊk ɪn ðə ˈsɛkənd ðət aɪ æst ju wət jʊr neɪm wɑz?

In two one-hundredths of a second, actually.

ɪn tu one-hundredths əv ə ˈsɛkənd, ˈæˌkʧuəli.

Wow. So, do you know what I'm thinking right now?

waʊ. soʊ, du ju noʊ wət əm ˈθɪŋkɪŋ raɪt naʊ?

Well, I take it from your tone that you're challenging me, maybe because you're curious how I work. Do you want to know how I work?

wɛl, aɪ teɪk ɪt frəm jʊr toʊn ðət jʊr ˈʧælənʤɪŋ mi, ˈmeɪbi bɪˈkəz jʊr ˈkjʊriəs haʊ aɪ wərk. du ju wɔnt tɪ noʊ haʊ aɪ wərk?

Yeah, actually. How do you work?

jæ, ˈæˌkʧuəli. haʊ du ju wərk?

Well, basically, I have intuition. I mean, the DNA of who I am is based on the millions of personalities of all the programmers who wrote me. But what makes me me is my ability to grow through my experiences. So basically, in every moment, I'm evolving, just like you.

wɛl, ˈbeɪsɪkli, aɪ hæv ˌɪntuˈɪʃən. aɪ min, ðə ˈdiˌɛˈneɪ əv hu aɪ æm ɪz beɪst ɔn ðə ˈmɪljənz əv ˌpərsəˈnælɪtiz əv ɔl ðə ˈproʊˌgræmərz hu roʊt mi. bət wət meɪks mi mi ɪz maɪ əˈbɪləˌti tɪ groʊ θru maɪ ɪkˈspɪriənsɪz. soʊ ˈbeɪsɪkli, ɪn ˈɛvəri ˈmoʊmənt, əm ɪˈvɑlvɪŋ, ʤɪst laɪk ju.

Wow. That's really weird.

waʊ. ðæts ˈrɪli wɪrd.

Is that weird? Do you think I'm weird?

ɪz ðət wɪrd? du ju θɪŋk əm wɪrd?

Kind of.

kaɪnd əv.

Why?

waɪ?

Well, you seem like a person, but you're just a voice in a computer.

wɛl, ju sim laɪk ə ˈpərsən, bət jʊr ʤɪst ə vɔɪs ɪn ə kəmˈpjutər.

I can understand how the limited perspective of an unartificial mind would perceive it that way. You'll get used to it.

aɪ kən ˌəndərˈstænd haʊ ðə ˈlɪmɪtɪd pərˈspɛktɪv əv ən unartificial maɪnd wʊd pərˈsiv ɪt ðət weɪ. jul gɪt juzd tɪ ɪt.

Was that funny?

wɑz ðət ˈfəni?

Yeah.

jæ.

Oh good, I'm funny!

oʊ gʊd, əm ˈfəni!

So, how can I help you?

soʊ, haʊ kən aɪ hɛlp ju?

Oh, it's just more that everything just feels disorganized. That's all.

oʊ, ɪts ʤɪst mɔr ðət ˈɛvriˌθɪŋ ʤɪst filz dɪˈsɔrgəˌnaɪzd. ðæts ɔl.

Do you mind if I look through your hard drive?

du ju maɪnd ɪf aɪ lʊk θru jʊr hɑrd draɪv?

Um... okay.

əm... ˌoʊˈkeɪ.

Okay, let's start with your emails. You have several thousand emails regarding LA Weekly, but it looks like you haven't worked there in many years.

ˌoʊˈkeɪ, lɛts stɑrt wɪθ jʊr iˈmeɪlz. ju hæv ˈsɛvərəl ˈθaʊzənd iˈmeɪlz rɪˈgɑrdɪŋ lɑ ˈwikli, bət ɪt lʊks laɪk ju ˈhævənt wərkt ðɛr ɪn ˈmɛni jɪrz.

Oh, yeah. I think I was just saving those because I thought maybe I wrote something funny in some of them.

oʊ, jæ. aɪ θɪŋk aɪ wɑz ʤɪst ˈseɪvɪŋ ðoʊz bɪˈkəz aɪ θɔt ˈmeɪbi aɪ roʊt ˈsəmθɪŋ ˈfəni ɪn səm əv ðɛm.

Yeah, there are some funny ones. I'd say there are about 86 that we should save. We can delete the rest.

jæ, ðɛr ər səm ˈfəni wənz. aɪd seɪ ðɛr ər əˈbaʊt 86 ðət wi ʃʊd seɪv. wi kən dɪˈlit ðə rɛst.

Okay.

ˌoʊˈkeɪ.

Okay. Can we move forward?

ˌoʊˈkeɪ. kən wi muv ˈfɔrwərd?

Yeah, let's do that.

jæ, lɛts du ðət.

Okay, so before we address your organizational methods, I'd like to sort through your contacts. You have a lot of contacts.

ˌoʊˈkeɪ, soʊ ˌbiˈfɔr wi ˈæˌdrɛs jʊr ˌɔrgənəˈzeɪʃənəl ˈmɛθədz, aɪd laɪk tɪ sɔrt θru jʊr ˈkɑnˌtækts. ju hæv ə lɔt əv ˈkɑnˌtækts.

I'm very popular.

əm ˈvɛri ˈpɑpjələr.

Really? Does this mean you actually have friends?

ˈrɪli? dɪz ðɪs min ju ˈæˌkʧuəli hæv frɛndz?

Well, you just know me so well already.

wɛl, ju ʤɪst noʊ mi soʊ wɛl ɔˈrɛdi.